Making a choice is hard.
To leave a choice made earlier, is even harder.
Familiarity brings security, yet depresses courage.
Ironically, with familiarity and security, it does not always equivalent to compatibility and suitability.
Everything seems to have a price to pay, and to go ahead or opt out, simply depends on whether we can bear the consequences.
A year ago despite many 'no'-s and 'u'll regret'-s, a choice was made - to trust myself and go ahead with the intention of not wanting to have regrets in life. haiz...whoever invented this motivation line, i'm not gonna buy that anymore, guess itll be better sometimes to have some regrets left behind. and sometimes, the harder you want to avoid regrets, the more regrets you're going to create.
To leave a choice made earlier, is even harder.
Familiarity brings security, yet depresses courage.
Ironically, with familiarity and security, it does not always equivalent to compatibility and suitability.
Everything seems to have a price to pay, and to go ahead or opt out, simply depends on whether we can bear the consequences.
A year ago despite many 'no'-s and 'u'll regret'-s, a choice was made - to trust myself and go ahead with the intention of not wanting to have regrets in life. haiz...whoever invented this motivation line, i'm not gonna buy that anymore, guess itll be better sometimes to have some regrets left behind. and sometimes, the harder you want to avoid regrets, the more regrets you're going to create.
and now, a year has gone. I'm too ego to admit defeat. honestly the outcome isn't as expected. It's a time you start to doubt yourself, doubt your choice, should I keep going? or should I just wave the white flag and save the future troubles? and face all the 'I told you so...'-s.
It's a scary feeling, when there're too much stakes being put in, to a point you thought you better don't lose and can't afford to lose anymore, yet the hard cold reality fact just comes and hits right into your face.
so shall more stakes be thrown in to secure a better win; or shall all stakes be let go and lost, and start all over again as soon as possible? My dear Buddha, please grant me the wisdom to make the right decision.
... however one thing for sure, i'm beginning to feel tired with this game.
2 comments:
I don't know. But somehow, it sounds true. I guess something must be troubling you. Hope that you'll be able to make up with a decision. Gambateh~
Janice: Thanks... i'm alright. not feeling as bad as before anymore :)
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